Lee, thats a good way to CYA - pretend youre talking about this as if it happened to someone else and then gauge your partners reaction. My gf went to a house party and got really drunk, and apparently kissed a g My girlfriend got drunk and kissed another guy, 2 months later she got drunk and kissed a girl, HELP. Because just as everyone else is saying, if you did the RIGHT thing, you shouldn't feel guilty. Please help me. When my husband came home, he could tell right away that I had been drinking. It should prevent you from repeating your actions. Because your significant other doesnt fully believe that you just kissed this person because you were intoxicated. Wow, you really do want a baby, don't you. Yet obviously (action of posting on a forum after having pulled the snog plug) you don't like that bit. David bit Jordan. Try-it-on, cheating sleazebag makes pass at loyally-married woman; So your crop had already been carrying a blight, hadn't it. I've never gone to a counsellor before, but I'm going to see one next week to talk through it. I'm going to be the best wife I can be going forward. There's a difference between sex and kissing. I know he would forgive me but I don't want to deal with issue with him. If I some how knew which thread to follow to I'd go. PostedNovember 9, 2014 New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast. I wish I told my wife, but she found out because in my browsing history I had searched should I tell my wife I kissed a girl when drunk. :-( Feel free to start a thread if you need to vent it all out.). So this was the whole tone in which I recounted it to hubby, ergo, he thought it was amusing (the event and my comeback), flattering to him *and* reassuring. I just knew you would cheat on me if given half a chance.. "then the cheeky ugger only went and bloody kissed me, didn't he! What? It felt so wrong and taboo yet so erotic and a sort of thrilling jealousy! They all agree that kissing is intimate with one even saying that to them, its more intimate than sex. Chelsea X Leeds - Ao Vivo Grtis HD Sem Travar | Futebol Grtis HD VerticalScope Inc., 111 Peter Street, Suite 600, Toronto, Ontario, M5V 2H1, Canada. Well, time for some fun questions: would you be telling him about it just to alleviate your own guilt? You knowing you can trust your husband to do the right thing when faced with temptation is all it takes for him to remain blight-free when blight (whether or not wearing fishnets) threatens. Shes Colombian and very fiery. In essence . I am the same way. The moment feelings are involved then youve cheated. You might come to the conclusion that something is lacking in your primary relationship, and you might decide to break up with your partner and pursue the person whom you kissed while drunk. I mean if a person can't rely on their own strength of character and self-discipline to stop them from crossing that line, they obviously NEED an outside deterrent. So if your planting includes a blight (guilty secret), please don't moan if it affects the crop yield. You had too much to drink and you kissed someone who wasnt your boyfriend or your girlfriend. Login first It didn't feel real. (Y)), Hey its really grtt to hear tht u really care n lot of emotion for ur hubbyv only come to kno abt our loyalty only when things like this happens.u kissed him thn u realised that u hv done mistake bcoz u really love ur hubby n dnt want to cheat him.but since commuting mistakes is a part of human nature n being human it happened but determined urself for not to continue or commit such mistake is the real proof of being loyal. Saying that, however, I note you wrote: 15 votes, 25 comments. stop any contact (outside of work) immediately. My libido is sharper when Im sober, at least if Im really attracted to a guy and have the love goggles on. One of the best ways is to offer effective apologies. There was a line that was crossed when they kissed, he should no longer have her as a Facebook friend, or any other communication with her. It's just a "good weekend?" However, before you choose option 3, you need to talk to the person you kissed when you are sober again and make sure that the other person has strong feelings for you, too. Everyone is telling me not to say anything because it was so long ago and it never happened again, or will it ever. So it looks as if we're suddenly at crossed-purposes, then. See what she has to say. Then the accusations begin, which night go something like: Why on earth did you kiss _________? When I woke up yesterday I still felt drunk but the reality of what happened hit me like a tonne of bricks. Soulmate I guess as long as you stay at this site I'll find all of you. Tell your husband. if you believe you have to tell him exactly as you did here , if your friends you were with are also his say he can ask them . Wife of 8 years straddled and flirted with my friend last night while drunk My Girlfriend Kissed Another Guy whilst Black-Out Drunk. Well as far as my experience with sex,I would definitely say I'm not an expert. Thus it's what I *DID DO* - back in September when at an Indian restaurant with friends (I mentioned it on this forum as apropos to someone's thread) and some bloke tried to come onto me. Boyfriend kissed another guy at a gay bar with me for my fantasy, i The doubt in your mind over his behaviour might actually be a doubt in your mind over yours. A I work in hospitality, so I can't change departments, but I can change my shift pattern. I was dumped.so why do *I* feel guilty? Whoops. Yes it hurts.. I believe that over time this would have happened with or without the wiskey. Try to let it go and forgive yourself. And I know himhad it made him feel the slightest bit threatened and worried, either he'd have said so there and then, or, if for some reason hadn't felt capable, would have shown in his behaviour at some point (I was watching for it regardless). Cell phones, texting, emails etc. An innocent kiss usually involves getting so plastered that you lose your inhibitions and someone tries to kiss you and you return the kiss. Tl;dr: why do I feel guilty after ending things with a guy who grabbed my ass during our first kiss? Is Flirting Cheating? 5 Signs That It Is - Psych Central However one night a boy kissed me and I kissed him back. i cried for days on and my bf couldnt figure out was . I have posted a vent and been waiting for your scathing reply. The short answer to your question, for this BPD is: No, I don't feel guilty. The other day, I had a first with my partner Flo: I put my tongue in another mans mouth while he stood by only to observe. Ugh, basically. Lets get down to the basics here. I rang the guy and said ' oh wow, so last night, that really happened, what the hell where we at? ' I was very drunk. That's what it takes to have a Grade A romance that never dies. Jam, your wife holds the cards. reader, anonymous, writes (25 October 2005): Already have an account? And I have never cheated myself. 3. Translation: I believe I wish to say, what the hell, what were we doing only I have a competing urge to chose a phrase that could be taken two ways, to ask, where are we at aka what happens with we two now? Even despite it included you having to become whatever degree of a low-down doity adulterer. female With or without the same seniority. My eyes were closed and my head was spinning. Still, now that the courts are coming down wider and heavier on emotional abuse, I'm sure it's just a matter of time. you are 18 or older, you read and agreed to the. He deserves the right to make the decision on whether he can forgive you and move on with you. I Was Raised By A 90 Years Old Ninja - Facebook You have no right to unburden your conscience at the expense of your partners happiness. And the tricky piece de resistance Biological ones. If you need help or advice, you can ask Yin & Yang. Im guessing that theres a good chance you would have gone all the way if the piano teacher had gone for it. If I were the husband and some how found out through a second party my trust would be broken. Answer (1 of 7): As you have not mentioned your gender, i am assuming you are a girl. A guy bought me drinks and he asked me if I wanted to ride his motorcycle to another bar and I did. 10 Things You Didn't Know About Guilt | Psychology Today If he forgave you, then it sounds like he accepted that it was a mistake, that you won't do it again and has moved on. I was very drunk. End of story. Come join the discussion about love, romance, health, behavior, conflict resolution, care, and more! A couple of nights ago I went out to a work function. Oh there really isn't any disagreement actually. I Kissed Another Guy When I Was Drunk, Should I Tell My Boyfriend? [2] ..you showed you don't think of he and you as a team by sharing all information pertinent to the relationship; Most people don't confess- You ask for advice of what you should do- you got the RIGHT advice. By clicking 'Accept and continue' you consent to our use of cookies in accordance with your preferences which can be reviewed / updated at any time via our Privacy Policy. I felt disorientated. Then he kissed me, and I kissed him back. I hadn't been out drinking for about 3 months beforehand, so think the excitement of the night, constant glasses prosecco and wine, and the buzz of just being all dolled up all mixed together to see me very giddy and tipsy. I really have a problem believing but forgave her and weve been together another 20 yrs now and have 15 grand children hasnt ever really bothered me but about 3 yrs ago it hit me like of bolt of lightning out of nowhere and I cant get that night out of my mind, keep obsessing over what they might have done and how they spent the 4 or 5 hours that they were together outside the venue that night. Or does it mean something bigger in terms of my own relationship? Your guilt is your punishment. As time elapsed, I realized that I was attracted to him and this began to concern me. If it were my husband, I would be upset too, because that would be so out of character for the man I know. I waited for the right time ?? I agree. I had had an argument with my fianc because I found a suspicious text from a woman , he became very mad . Maybe you didnt deliberately set out to kiss him or her, but you feel guilty about the kiss because you realize you always wanted to kiss that person, but were afraid to kiss because you harbored hidden feelings for that person. As for what we believe about kissing being the gateway to sex (specifically foreplay, which itself is the main gate): if anyone believes it *isn't*, thenwellAll I could say to that is: ;-)). Evidently. I wonder how that struggle with trust might affect bonding within a romantic relationship contex- oh, wait - could it, would it, on a train in the rain with a fox in a box, Sam-I-Am, possibly always communicate to your husband a sense that you don't fully enough trust *him*, in which case that must mean you're judging him by YOUR standards ergo he'd better hold back a bit just in case? Then he kissed me, and I kissed him back. 5. get into counselling. Look at your first kiss after divorce as a new beginning, a new chapter. Pre-kiss, the straight guys none of whom have ever kissed another man before are asked where society hasanyrules for interaction between heterosexual men. Personally, I think even innocently returning a kiss is cheating, although Id probably keep it to myself! Are you sure you didnt have sex with him/her? They need to hold people more accountable to commitment. Good luck. Such as crying,begging that would be enough for me to give them a second chance. Married woman slaps sleazebag's face and leaves. IAMHIM (person claiming to be an unregistered passer-by), Assistir Chelsea X Leeds - Ao Vivo Grtis HD sem travar, sem anncios. The caller wasn't experienced (like me). Things have gone a fair way beyond ideal but you aren't a silly school girl after your first taste of wine. Similarly, meeting with someone privately and not telling your partner can also be a warning sign that . How can I get over the guilt of kissing another man? - Female First In the end we all do what serves us best But don't shoot the messenger.. Righd AWN, sistah! I'm not going to let that or any insulting aspersions, subtle or otherwise, put me off. Maybe she was experimenting or it was something shed thought about and wanted to see what it felt like. If a man or woman were genuine in asking for forgiveness. Well, now, that little lot *definitely* counts as 'debate fodder' relevant to this whole issue, rather than pure chit-chat. And note, you don't HAVE to take my advice. And what Simone Bienne said on the love line. There is more going on. (Sorry you got cheated on. Go cold turkey. I thought we were talking, in context of the above-type scenario, about mouth-to-mouth kissing being a 'gateway to sex' for the fact of it sparking physical arousal, ergo, whether delayed or in-the-moment, counts as foreplay, ergo, infidelity (albeit, granted, at the thin area of that whole wedge). lover. Not sure how anyone can say they're "certain" he doesn't need to know, given the fact that he made his own standards and expectations perfectly clear on that score, back when he himself was the 'victim' of a come-on. reader, anonymous, writes (25 October 2005): A I myself have had issues in the past months but I won't elaborate. That's alright, that's a common mistake. The Fora platform includes forum software by XenForo. Itachi, Lees theory can backfire, especially if the person really believes you are talking about someone else and then he/she finds out you are talking about someone that YOU did. Therefore, you might be surprised to learn the following facts about guilt: What can you do to address unresolved guilt? Arun, I agree with everything you said here because I was guilty of kissing a guy I liked when I was drunk, knowing that I liked him and wanted to see how much.". Feel free to start your own thread if you finally find you've a need to.). I recall an incident years ago, we were very young, just teenagers, and a girl planted a big kiss on my hubby (then boyfriend) on a night out. (PS: These 'recent issues' of yours. I am sure this girl knows he is married. To be honest, my stomach is sick with the thoughts of the whole thing. There was a lot of biting and groping going on, because, you know, the guys were giving it their best shot. It ended up leading to a follow-up video of straight girls kissing other girls for the first time. Feeling guilt when dumping the guy : r/datingoverthirty And it's weird, but it's like I need the guy to tell me what I did was ok and I'm not a bad person. I could list so many reasons why, but instead Ill just list a few. :-*. For me infidelity is a deal breaker I don't care what the circumstances were. / Houston, turns out I/you/I+You can't have kids the natural way after all, which is no-one's fault; let's try IVF / adopt / foster / console ourselves with the fact we'll always have each other, and the babies of people we know to borrow, and the freedom and greater financial means to please ourselves. However for the next time please be careful and never do such a blunder because he's a gem and you should not lose him just for your stupid or foolish acts .i mean any sophisticated or a ONE MAN WOMAN (a proud title for me :) and hopflly for u too ) wont like to stress her relatn or leave a man whom she loves or take him in a position where he might leave ? Alcohol does not change that fact. Social media, the Internet, texting and so on. Because telling him something that you regret and will never do again is doing exactly that. I think it is a better idea for both of you good luck.do share progress. Please leave me a comment. And Ill tell you why by first giving you some context the back. Before delving into my own personal story, Id like to address this subject generally. Or run away? I had three i agree with everyone there's some really good sharing here. Create an account to follow your favorite communities and start taking part in conversations. Mumsnet carries some affiliate marketing links, so if you buy something through our posts, we may get a small share of the sale (more details here), but then I was cheated on for years by ExH and I would now put myself first. You just never, ever know. Wouldn't you? I am deeply shocked this has happened and I don't know who to turn to for help. So if life hands you lemons, don't HIDE them where they could one day trip you up or cause a rotten stink. We were chatting when we realised the other woman was snoring. We use cookies on our site to remember your preferences, monitor site traffic and offer personalised ads. 3 Ways to Keep Guilt From Ruining Your Relationships It takes to heal the wounded trust again. Be the adult here. As long as you are sincere about making this work, your punishment should be to bear this guilt. His imagination could go haywire over that one. By clicking 'Submit' or otherwise submitting this form you agree to the, By entering this site you declare I'm not married nor have I ever been married. Team spirit is this: Years after my divorce the one thing that still makes me really angry is that my XH should have ended the marriage as thats what he wanted. "He's a great kisser" what she said to me. Need help with your relationship? Even though it took her a while to make that choice, she both never recognized her role and then made a series of bad choices after. Your Drinking Behaviour. I think they all count as cheating and I'm not sure it's necessary to make a distinction. How To Cope With Guilt When You Hurt Someone In A Relationship If I ws on ur place I would never have told him because he loves me so much and respect me so much and really trust me like anything and if you are guilty and try to relieve ur guilt by telling him still doesn't prove to be beneficial for you and other than that it creates a doubt in his heart that would be very mych lowering The respect he has in his heart for you. JavaScript is disabled. Personally, if nothing happened apart from him buying drinks and giving you a ride home, then I wouldnt have told at all. Perhaps this one is geared more toward the ladies, but I feel pretty confident in assuming that no matter the . I could go on about a lot of things here.
i feel guilty for kissing another guy